every year, i buy a new calendar.
i wait until the very end of january to do this because they are usually in the discount bin by then marked at a desperate price.
once i rescue a poor, unwanted calendar (usually containing pictures of grossly ugly dogs), i bring it home, and begin transferring important dates and information from the old to the new.
in this process, i imagine what the future year has in store.
petty things.
will i have a valentine?
will i be totally wasted on st. patrick's day?
will have have to color eggs on easter?
what will my costume be on halloween?
heavier things.
will one of my loved ones die this year?
will i die this year?
it's not only the future i reflect upon, however, but it's the past as well.
dates of concerts i'd been to, and many i'd flaked out on.
dates of obligations that bring up both painful and joyful memories.
but of them all the most difficult tend to be birthdates.
i go through the difficult process of choosing who to carry-over.
and who to leave behind.
many over the years have been left behind.
but a strong, select few carry over year after year after year.
those who i have a strong admiration for.
a strong connection with.
even though we have kept out of touch for such long periods of time.
and haven't touched or seen each other for years it must be.
you are still carried over.
and your name brings a huge smile to my face as i write it.
happy birthday, betty.
thinking of you. <3

Current Mood: cheerful

so my blood tests finally came back from the doctor and it turns out i have polycystic ovaries.
i've been blogging about it on tumblr, but i realized you guys here probably don't read it, and i wanted to give you an update.
i have to take birth control till the day i die to control my hormones.
doc says i'll probably be "completely changed" by next month :x  i'm kind of scared of how i'll change.  when your hormones have been one way all your life and then suddenly they're "fixed" lots can happen o-o.  eek.

Current Mood: shocked

i've ordered shirley's and myan's presents online.
i hope you like them <3

Current Mood: ecstatic

http://view.playlist.com/3232629003/standalone

Current Mood: bored

Current Mood: nauseated

:D

i went to target and wanted every single thing!

i can’t believe domo kun is promoting halloween there!!!!!

^OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO^

Current Mood: cheerful

i love how abc calls it "stay at home week"
and TRIES to cover it up as a stay-at-home-with-your-family thing
right
STAY AT HOME AND WATCH TV!
while i hate being effected by corporate ploys....
yeah, i'm never leaving my house again.
the office, heroes, grey's anatomy, ugly betty, desperate housewives, dexter, etc.... if i were a boy, i think i'd have a boner right now.
tonight how i met your mother!
the only show that doesn't fall into this week is pushing daisies.
i might dress up and bake some pies for that shit.
^o^
i think i'll work on homework to make the time pass faster.

Current Mood: excited

www.youtube.com/watch
that is ninja cat.

Current Mood: happy

my work is starting to snowball.
shit.

Current Mood: stressed

>.<

i wish it would rain here :]

i’m getting that feeling… like it’s going to rain.

i can feel it in the pit of my stomach.  like i’m anxious about something, but it’s not so much a crippling nervous anxiety… almost like the feeling of butterflies when you have a strong crush on someone, but there’s no one to think about sporadically throughout your day that sends shockwaves through you…

it’s like a constant feeling rather than a feeling with random spikes…

i don’t know if you know what i mean.

Current Mood: cold